Thursday, December 16, 2010

A must read Christmas story!

I have followed Katherine's blog for over a year now and adore her 3 beautiful boys, and her sense of humor.  Today she shared a beautiful story of a true event that her father experienced that I just have to pass on, so please go read A Christmas Story.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

4 things

4 shows I watch:
1. Grey’s Anatomy
2. Biggest Loser
3. Extreme Home Makeover
4. Mercy (still working my way through the only season)

4 things I am passionate about:
1. Family
2. Reading
3. Music
4. Nursing

4 phrases I say a lot:
1. Thank you and You’re welcome (Jax is saying TY a lot so we try to say YW back as well as TY when he deserves one)
2. Great (both happily and sarcastically)
3. Pee and Pooy (potty training means lots of potty talk)
4. Well Sh*t

4 things I have learned from the past:
1. No regrets, even bad decisions can be lessons and make me who I am today
2. Forgive even if you can’t forget
3. Marry your best friend or it will never work
4. Let go and love with all your heart

4 places I would like to go:
1. Ireland
2. Scotland
3. Australia
4. Key West

4 things I did yesterday:
1. Spent too much time in the bathroom
2. Called in sick to work (See #1)
3. Snuggled lots with Jax
4. Watched some more Boston Med

4 things I am looking forward to:
1. Jax being 100% potty trained
2. Having Corbin all grown up so I can know how independent she’ll be rather then stuck waiting, hoping, and worrying about it
3. SUMMER!!!! I am sick of cold and snow already
4. Eventually buying our own home

4 things I love about winter:
1. Can I think of one thing? Ummm Christmas is usually ok
2. Seeing family at Thanksgiving (Thanksgiving is close enough to winter right?)
3. The start of a fresh new year
4. January is both my boys’ birthdays

4 things on my wish list:
1. Our own house
2. A better vehicle
3. A job I truly love
4. A warmer climate

Monday, December 13, 2010

Monday Minute and More Love Monday

Join the fun with Cristy for Monday Minute!

(1) Who is your favorite actor? Curently I love Gerard Butler. I am really enjoing his movies lately and the accent + his body don’t hurt.

(2) Do you collect anything? Americana d├ęcor - I became obsessed with it in my teens in part to being born in the year of the bi-centinial

(3) What's the biggest turn off in someone of the opposite sex? Too cocky and or controlling. You are not better then me and you are not my boss.

(4) If you HAD to change your first name, what would you change it to and why? I would love to not have a name that was so popular during my generation but haven’t really thought much about what name I would prefer. Maybe Miranda, close but not as over used.

(5) What virtue is better: forgiveness or justice? I’d have to say for my own mental health I have learned it is important for me to forgive injustices toward myself in order to move on past the hurt and anger.

Then head on over and share the love with Katie!

Friday, December 10, 2010

Five Foto Friday

I realized I really need to take more pictures, and not just of the kids, but of me, TJ, and other things that might catch my eye.  So I decided I should start doing a weekly photo post to encourage me to use my camera more.  So here is the first installment of my Five Foto Friday.  These were all taken in the last two weeks.
I love this grin, just wish he wasn't running out of the shot.

Jax took this one of me with some mommy help.

Helping Dad vacuum.

Riding the carousel at the mall with Dad.

And one of the few pictures I have of Corbin since she got her glasses.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

life story part 4

And an update or part 4 of my story.

Shortly after that LJ entry Corbin and I headed down to San Antonio, TX where we started out staying with my grandparents. They were able to loan me a car till I was able to buy it from them and give us a place to stay while I got on my feet. When I left TJ and I had planned that once I was settled he would join me. In April 2005 he did just that.

That summer David got out of prison, again, and was living with his grandmother. We started talking and making plans to file for a non-contested divorce. In early September after not being able to reach David for awhile regarding sending him the paperwork, I tried calling his grandmother. When she returned my call she told me David had been shot and was on life support in SLU hospital’s ICU. She had tried to find my number but his phone had gone missing the night he was shot. After 6 months of ups and downs, of being on and off life support David passed away on Feb 29th 2006 at 30 years old.

On May 9th 2006 TJ and I were married while on a camping trip with friends and Corbin. That summer we joined those same friends in Pittsburg, PA and lived there until June of 2007 when we returned once more to Marshall, MO. And in June of 2008 we found out we were pregnant after two years of TTC. I first started this blog while I was pregnant and you can find Jax’s birth story right here and pregnancy reports in my archives.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Life story part 3

Now for part three:

On May 29th 2001 my daughter Corbin Jayne H. was born. Doug convinced me we should try to work things out for Corbin's sake so when I got my own apartment he moved in with me. Those the months were hell for me and all I could think about was TJ. When he came home on leave that September it just made things worse. I wanted so badly to be with him and the fighting with Doug got worse. In October I kicked him out and started talking more with TJ.

Then in spring of 2002 I decided to try to go to nursing school. I was so nervous about getting in. TJ came home on another leave and having him around helped distract me while I waited to find out if I had made it or not. Just before he left I got the news that I had been accepted. Knowing that TJ would be out of the Navy about the time I graduated nursing school, before he left we agreed to give our relationship a real try when he got home for good.

It was a tough year and I felt so lonely with no one to lean on when I got discouraged. I missed TJ so much.

Then in June 2003 less then 2 months before graduation TJ walked into Amanda's apartment. I was so excited I had waited to see him again for over a year, then he took me outside and told me there was someone else and he couldn't see me. I was so shocked I spent the first few days walking around in a daze. After waiting for 13 months to be with him, after 13 months of dreaming about our life together it wasn't going to happen.

I spent the next 6 months alone and angry. I didn't even want to try to find someone else. I just wanted what I had with TJ back.

In November I got the first news of David I had heard in 5 years. Still legally married to him I pursued this clue to his whereabouts hoping to finally get my divorce. David had other ideas. He convinced me that he had changed, that he had grown a lot and was a different person, he begged me to give him another chance. I refused for awhile but he wouldn't take no for an answer and he moved in with me.

In the 6 months we were together things where ok. We moved around a lot and ended up back in NC, but we didn't fight all the time and he never lost his temper. Then I got a job and he started stealing from my employer. When people started getting suspicious he wanted me to take the heat because with my clean record I would get just a slap on the wrist and he would go back to prison. I told him there was no way I would do that and turned him in.

Then I went back to St. Charles, Missouri, to live with an aunt, unemployed and broke, with little hope for the future till I can get a car. But TJ and I found each other again, we both free from our crazy exs and hoping to build something.

And this is where I ended this in 2004, so next up is my update on the next 6 years.

Magical Monday Blog Hop

Join us for a blog hop at For The Love Of Blogs!

Monday Minute and More Love Monday

(1) Who would play you in a movie? I really can’t think of any actress I look like, so I’ll go with Drew Barrymore because we are of the same generation, I love her personality, and I think she would do well at getting all the phases I’ve gone through.

(2) Are you a good speller? No but word usage is a biggy for me like two, to, too and their, there or your, you’re

(3) Have you/ do you smoke cigarettes? Yes, unfortunately I started at 21 in Job Corps

(4) Have you ever won a trophy? Yes, for Speech in high school

(5) Have you ever written (or started to write) a book? LoL, yes, in Jr high and it was bad

If you are here for one hop, please visit the other.  If you are here for the first time, I am working on my life story so have a look around.

Life story part 2

Ok on with part 2 - life started getting sticky after high school.

Then just after graduation I found out I was pregnant. Some people pushed me trying to make me get back together with Ben but I refused, wouldn't even tell him I was pregnant because I knew he would insist on marriage. My parents then told me they would not pay for me to go to school, due to my not being able to work full time while attending.

That's when I met David. He was cute and sweet and told me he didn't care if I was pregnant. 48 hours after we meet I went to North Carolina with him. 2 weeks later we married. Within a few months things changed a lot, he was controlling and angered quickly. Then he started hitting me. At 7 months pregnant he sat on my stomach and tried to smother me with a pillow.

My son was born almost 4 weeks early on January 3rd 1996. He was named David Auburn L. III. By time he was 3 months old I had convinced David to give him to my parents and he signed papers that he was not his father and gave up his rights to him. My parents and I renamed him Bailey Joseph H.

I was with David off and on for almost 2 years going through the usual cycle of domestic violence. When I left him in April of 1997 I said it was forever.

That summer I lived in a battered women's shelter before going to Job Corps in the fall. I dated a few guys then left Job Corps to live in Kansas with Terry. While in KS I went to school and got my EMT and my CNA.

Within a year I was sick of the problems we were having and I moved to Florida to live with Stephen, who I had meet on a dating line. While living in FL I was diagnosed with Lupus and Fibromylagia. Loved my time in FL but missed my friends and family so moved once more.

This time back to Marshall, MO where I moved in with my best friend, Amanda. Long story slightly shortened I hooked up with a friend of hers, Doug, she and I got in a fight and he and I moved to St. Charles, MO.

On my 25th birthday I found out I was pregnant again. Was so thrilled this time. Doug was excited also and started hoping for a girl.

When I was 6 months pregnant we moved back to Marshall and my best friend and I made up. A few weeks later things got ugly with Doug and I and he kicked me out. So in I move with Amanda (best friend) and her son. We were both pregnant, she 6 weeks behind me and had a blast spending our pregnancies together.

While living with Amanda old friend of hers whom she talked about all the time stopped by to say hi while home on leave form the Navy. And of course I a sucker for military guys was immediately interested (helped that he was tall (6ft6in) and really cute). TJ and I spent as much time together that leave as Amanda would allow and I was hooked.

To be continued again…

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Life story part 1

Ok once again this is an edit/updated version of an old LJ post, which I will be posting in parts because 1. It is LONG and 2. I am so tired from this head cold I am battling.

Going to try to make this as quick, simple and to the point as possible for my crazy life.

Born Oct. 8th 1976 to Edward and Theresa M. Named Amanda Jill M. By age 2 my parents were separated, divorced by 3 and never saw my father after 3.

My mother worked crazy hours to support me alone and I spent most of my early childhood with my great-grandmother Mimi.

Mom started dating Jeff H when I was 7. He and I became very close and his family adored me from the beginning. They married when I was 10 and that Christmas I legally became Amanda H.

9 months after the wedding when I was 10 and a half my sister Paige Elizabeth was born. 2 years later we added Alexandra Lane. My early teens were spent helping my mom care for my sisters.

In High School I certainly wasn't a straight-laced goody-goody but wasn't the worst kid I knew. I dated 2 guys my freshman year. One, Toney was an off and on thing the other Britt was to make Toney jealous. Just before starting my sophomore year Toney left for the Navy and when he came home for my 16th birthday he asked me if I would marry him after I finished high school. I was thrilled and knowing my mother knew she would be too. She had always loved Toney because of his family. That spring he married another girl. So I went on a short one night stand fling for a few months out of my anger. Then I meet Chris a 24 year old paramedic/DJ. My parents hated the idea of me with such an older guy until they meet Chris and mom started pushing me closer. Saw Chris through a painful divorce and custody fight, then just after my 17th birthday he dumped me for an older woman. So once again single I decided to be alone awhile. The end of Junior year I enlisted in the Missouri Army National Guard as a Military Police and was being shipped off to Fort Jackson, SC for basic training. In St. Louis on my way out I meet Ben. He was shy, sweet, and cute. I fell fast. He was heading to Ft Jackson for his advanced training so we spent the whole long trip getting to know each other. I even got him going to church with me every Sunday so we could see each other, I am so luck my drill instructors where ok with it, I could have gotten into big trouble for it. After a bad knee injury near the end of basic I was given a medical discharge. When the summer was over and we came home we got engaged. He lived 3 hours away and between my busy Senior year, his college schedule, and his weekends with the guard it was hard to find time together but we spent at least one weekend a month together. I soon tired of hearing "Whatever you want you're the boss". I wanted a man with a spine to give me his opinion on things and not a yes man. So the weekend of my Senior Prom I broke up with him. I had been accepted to a prestigious broadcasting school in St. Louis and my parents had agreed to pay my way, life was looking great.
To be continued…

Upcoming Life story post

Well I found my old life story from way back in my LJ days and hope to post it here soon, but wow it really needs some editing and updating. I wrote it back in 2004 and apparently my writing has improved because it needs help. But I plan on working on it tonight and posting when I get home or in the morning. Yes, this is my weekend to work, but I have lucked out in that I had 3 weekends in a row off with taking vaccation, so now it is back to every other weekend again.

Friday, December 3, 2010

It's Friday... let's blog hop

Katie's hop - be sure to check her sweet blog, Love with Kate and have a look around here if your coming from her hop.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

I’m not usually vocal about political issues and such things but this one has both me and my hubby TJ a little ticked.

Now you may ask why that would have us upset. Are we producers, dealers, or even users of meth? Of course not and would never even consider it. So why the issue for us. It actually ties in to the rising cost of health care and how my little family is in a situation I bet most families are in.

We are a one income household. Now this does mean we live paycheck to paycheck and don’t get to have a lot of extras. We do have health insurance through my job, I am a state employee (which means Gov Nixon is my top boss). But with ever increasing premiums, co-pays, and deductibles we basically have health insurance we can’t use. Now we do go for our free check-ups/physicals/vaccines but we have a triage system for deciding who can and for what the doctor is visited. Now thankfully for the most part we are all pretty healthy. I do have asthma and fibromylagia but manage both with OTC meds. Now we do all have seasonal allergies and of course occasionally get colds. If Gov Nixion has his way we would no longer be able to shell out $10ish for OTC meds for these minor health issues but instead would have two choices, to shell out $30 co-pay to Dr plus a med co-pay of $5 or $10 dollars or suffer and hope home remedies work. We all know the people who they are trying to stop will find other ways or other drugs, so as far as I am concerned families like mine are the only people who will suffer.

So are we in the minority by not being able to afford to use our health insurance? Am I wrong in thinking this is something that would just make the meth-heads change to a different way to make their meth or a different drug altogether? Anyone else care to weigh in and share their thoughts?